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The Holi Debate

It's that time of the year again, time to indulge in some Holi'er than thou preachings. Waterless Holi & Crackerless Diwali.

For a very short span of time, my folks were in Jaunpur, a small town near Varanasi. I think in all the places I have ever lived, UP has the worst monsoon season. Rains only a little, just high humidity to remind you of the season you are in. It is also the season of insects of all sorts, and not just your average mosquitoes. Usually during Diwali, it begins to get colder (it is always windy and your workout of the day is achieved by running in and out to light the diyas). But it's not cold enough to kill all those insects. Back to Jaunpur, on the day after Diwali, we are treated to a green carpet on our verandah. The fumes from the mustard oil and the crackers ends the season of insects.
I have lived in Bangalore at a time when you could call it a city. Back then although it was a cosmopolitan city, the IT invasion had yet to happen. We used to just get a day off for Diwali. And what I remember the most is pretty much the silence on Diwali Nights. We were the loud North Indians bursting crackers. Most of the city was happy celebrating Diwali with an early morning oil bath.
Ahmedabad was a different story altogether, Gujaratis celebrated this festival for 5 days, and we were warned to stock up on food as the shops/vendors everything will pretty much be shut. Where there were Gujaratis religiously bursting crackers even on the morning of the 5th day, there were plenty who were taking a break & heading out of the city.
The whole point of showing off my vast "cultural" experiences is, every city had a different idea of the same festival across the country. We've witnessed a rapid migration in the last decade. Hence there's been a homogenisation of cultures. Let's accept it in a war between fun crackers and a 5am sun bath, crackers will win. We also live in times of dispensable money and higher consumerism. Where my brother & I could only squeeze our folks for crackers worth less than 500, kids these days have access to grenade level fireworks.

The whole point about this mindless rambling is, don't take away the small pleasures in life from yours or your kid's life. Don't go nuts and ban crackers in the house, but try not to buy off the entire store also. Festivals have always been about sharing and socialising. Pool in your crackers, if you still have that extra money get some fireworks expert and put up a show for your neighbourhood. Diwali is not all about crackers, but some part of it is.

I know a Diwali post around Holi is weird. The problem is not in these festivals, but how careless we have become with our resources. Nobody opened up the hoses for us as kids. People valued watered back then. Get a bucket, fill it up with water from the tap somewhere. Carry it back and fill up your pichkaris and go play. Let the kids be kids. But you should try and be an adult and refrain from dirtying that pool.

BTW, all those Bolly Celebs preaching about waterless holi, seriously dude? There's a saying in Hindi, "sau choohe kha billi hajj ko chali". Bollywood is probably one of the biggest promoter of Holi parties, in the movies and outside. They also happen to be the promoters of Karvachauth, but that's for another day.

If you really want to reduce your water print, use that bucket instead of a shower.
Don't buy clothes, like ever! It takes around 1,800 gallons of water to grow enough cotton to produce just one pair of jeans! That's just the growing cotton part of it.
If you eat beef, you have the biggest water print in this world.
You said you liked rice? Switch to another grain, water intensive.
You bought a car, that's 39,000 gallons of water.
The list goes on and on. Basically, unless you are living like those saadhu babas, you are consuming too much water. So don't preach.

If you really care about conserving water, it might also help to change your tone. Instead of saying, let's not waste water this holi, try and say: Hi, I'm trying to reduce my water print this Holi, by going vegetarian this month, or taking a bucket shower this summer, so that our kids can still enjoy this festival, just as we did as kids. Join me.

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