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To Burkini or Not to Bikini

The French have now taken it upon themselves to free Muslim women in France of the oppressive, regressive burqa, in all it's forms. Yay, for France, hope that doesn't blow up in their faces (quite literally).

On a scale of 1 to 10, burqa for me ranks at a -100. More than anything else, the colour just baffles me. Islam has it's roots in one of the hottest regions on this world. Who in their right mind made a clothing decision like this in the desert? I understand ladies black is flattering and all. But seriously, black? It's a stupid colour for the desert for two reasons. The first and very obvious one, it would just make the woman hotter, and second, the dark colour against sand would make it look dirty all the time. Look at the men in their breezy white dishdashas. Now that my ladies, is desert/ sun appropriate.

Freedom is all about having a choice.

Let's start with the bikini first.

  • Can, I not shave/wax my legs,arms, underarms, bikini lines and still wear a bikini? Just Ewww.
  • Can, I have more than 4% fat and wear a bikini? Cover up you jiggly fatso or stay indoors.
  • Can, I get one without sideboob/underboob spillage? You've got boobs, who are you?
  • Can, I atleast get some support there? This is not a bra!
  • How does a bikini help swim? I can't even......


Fun fact about bikini : The name bikini comes from an island named Bikini Atoll that US used as a nuclear bomb test site during World War 2.

If there was an opposite of the word bikini, it would definitely be burkini. A swimsuit that literally covers you from head to toe. Although you might think it originated out of the Middle East, it was crafted in Australia. The idea was to allow burqa wearing Muslim women to enjoy the beach. Also help her not drown in sea in her burqa. It's funny the designer thought that this would help immigrants assimilate better in Australia.

Let's examine the burkini now.

  • Do I have to wax? Hahahha nops.
  • Do I have to be a supermodel to wear it? Nops
  • Does it protect my skin from Sun? Sure
  • How is it different from fullbody surfsuits? Plenty, but are those banned?

There's a video somewhere on the Internet, which shows the evolution of beachwear in US, how it started with bloomers and measuring tape wielding men checking the length of the suit to it's current form. How different are the current French Police from that man checking the length of women's swimsuit?

Fun fact about Burkini: Nigella Lawson had worn the burkini for her ex husband who liked his women pale white.

Women of this world, don't let men or other women dictate what you wear. If it pleases you pull a superwoman & wear a Bikini over a Burkini.

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